The Life-Changing Possibilities of Pole Dancing

When I started pole dancing, I was looking for a stress reliever. I had settled into a routine that mainly seemed to consist of, well, just work. This kind of one-track commitment was new for me: I grew up involved in activities ranging from gymnastics and dance to soccer and track. I knew I needed to try something different, to get myself motivated to move my body in ways that would bring me joy again.

I had tried pole dancing a few years back, and I remembered loving it, but classes were just too expensive for me to go consistently at the time. Now, with my first steady job post-college, it seemed like the right time to return. I tested out various places until I finally found my go-to: Brooklyn’s Finest Pole Dancing, a cozy studio on Carroll street. Not only was it a five-minute ride from my apartment, but I appreciated its intimate feel, and how Vel Francis, the studio owner, gave everyone individual attention. Her studio felt like a work-out and a therapy session all in one because of the diverse clientele that started to feel like family as we chatted during warm-ups. It became clear that this time was a collective sigh for all of us, whether someone wanted to blow off steam after work, or they were getting in some me-time after dinner with their kids. For me, simply entering this space was a relief because it had nothing to do with my job, family, or friends—it was a place of possibility where I could focus on whatever I wanted to achieve physically, emotionally, and with community.

I took Vel’s beginner class three times a week for three months until I moved up to intermediate/advanced and spin pole classes. Before I moved up, I would stick around to watch the advanced classes, studying their movements and meditating on how I would one day do those tricks with them. When I flew home to Chicago for long weekends or holidays, I would always make sure to visit Fly Club Chicago, my pole home away from home, for Divine Em and Caitlin Marco’s bubbly and inviting energy and range of classes.

As I became more obsessed with pole, I felt my strength and confidence increasing (I swear, no one will hype you up the way the pole community will!). But most importantly, I was healing.

I suffered from PTSD my senior year of college after I was in a near-death accident. Fitness had always been my way of relieving stress, but injuries to my ribs and head meant that higher impact activities were out of the question. I fell out of touch with my body as I searched for other ways to relieve the new anxiety within it. Poetry served, and eventually gentler practices like yoga and salsa dancing did too. Pole marked a new phase in my healing, showing me how I could feel both emotionally soothed and physically strengthened at the same time.

Pole has helped me feel in control of my body as I live in a society filled with people trying to police women on what they should and shouldn’t be doing. It’s also helped me reconnect to my inner child, providing a space to play and try something new, a space to push past fears when it comes to mastering new tricks—a mentality I now apply to everyday life.

Thanks to virtual classes, Youtube, and Instagram videos, I’ve been able to continue growing as a pole dancer during the pandemic. My mother helped me install an at-home pole—bolting it into the ceiling—in our attic after I found a 7 foot, 45 mm version on Xpole. (The activity has clearly found fans amid quarantine—when I first looked for a pole, they were all sold out.) It’s been a reliable opportunity to rest my mind, since it requires my full attention and presence—I can’t check my phone when I’m spinning by one leg! Being able to throw on any song to fit my mood and just float during my pole sessions has been a constant reminder that, no matter how much is out of my control, what is in my control is my mind, body, and joy.

Below, three pole dancers who have inspired my journey share why they started the sport, what kept them going, and what it’s meant to them in this past year.

AnnaKia

AnnaKia is a professional aerialist who has danced on tour with Summer Walker. She’s the owner of HouseOfBaelien, an online vintage store filled with statement pieces.

Why she started pole dancing: I started pole dancing in 2012 after a really hard year of battling depression. Not only was I dealing with the loss of my father, I was also struggling with the loss of my identity. At the time, I felt like I no longer knew who I was anymore because I had always been identified and introduced as Dr. Jackson’s daughter. I was utterly lost! After the umpteen day in my room, alone and unsure, I ran across a pole dancer on YouTube and I felt a “that” spark of excitement. It was the first time in what felt like a long time that I felt anything other than sadness. I looked up my first class and it was history from there.

What pole dancing has meant to her this past year: Pole dancing has been so many things to me at so many different times. It's giving me life, given me friends and new family, it gave me access to my sensual self that I never knew. It’s been heartache, my source of income, my passion, a visual representation of me and what I am going through internally. It has saved me! During quarantine it’s only strengthened the bond and connection I have with pole. It keeps me grounded in the waves of my emotional self.

Her advice to those who want to start pole: My best advice when it comes to people who want to try pole is: Do it! Look up studios in your area and take a class. Don’t talk yourself out of it by saying my body isn’t ready, I am not strong enough, not small enough. Pole is for everyone and every body! As a whole we want to welcome everyone into our little piece of heaven.



Dalijah Franklin

Franklin is the founder of Black Girls Pole, a global community and movement diversifying the pole community by inspiring and educating women of color about pole.

Why she started pole dancing: I started pole with a friend just as something to try, but here I am 13 years later and it is a major part of my life and has become my business.

What pole dancing has meant to her this past year: Pole means confidence and empowerment to me. The amount of confidence and strength you gain by doing this sport is rewarding on so many levels. Pole to me in 2020 has been very humbling. I have been a pole dancer for 12 years. I became a mom this year and getting back into it after having a baby has been challenging! I appreciate my body so much more now for how strong it is and also learning to give myself grace as I gain my strength again and fall in love with this new body!

Why she thinks you should try something new this year: 2020 has been unlike anything we have ever imagined, so I think now is the time to reimagine hobbies, businesses, and what you will have done or created when we come out of this pandemic. There is no time like the present to try something new and see where it takes you!

Sammy Picone

Picone is a pole dancer who has danced, alongside AnnaKia, for Summer Walker’s tour.

Why she started pole dancing:

My best friend convinced me to come to a pole class just before we graduated from college. I was in one of the lowest places of my life, recovering from a cancer diagnosis and an emotionally abusive relationship. I resisted going to the class wholeheartedly and thankfully was outvoted by my friends. The first few classes were difficult as hell because they forced me to confront many of the effects that the years prior had had on me mentally and physically. And yet the pain of confronting that disappeared into thin air the moment I found out I could invert...realizing my strength in that moment was the moment I knew I would pole for the rest of my life.

What pole dancing has meant to her this past year: Pole has provided me an outlet to press pause on the world in a lifesaving way. I’m sure many of us are familiar with the loop of anxious thoughts and negative self talk that often plays on repeat in our heads. Pole has been the only outlet in my life thus far that quite literally brings my thoughts to a stop and allows me to bathe in silence for a period of time. It’s also allowed me to give myself permission to grow into—and to embrace—my power in ways that I am incredibly thankful for.

My relationship with pole has waxed and waned over the years and that hasn’t changed in 2020. That being said the moments that I have reunited with pole this year have been some of the greatest exhales; they’ve equipped me with the strength to persevere when I struggled to see the purpose in pushing forward.

Something she wants you to know about pole dancing:

For the past couple of years one of the main messages I have tried to communicate to my audience is: respecting where pole dance came from. There is a longstanding practice in the pole industry that attempts to separate pole dance from stripping and sex work and to vilify the two. Many fail to realize—because we often aren’t taught in the places we learn—that the art of stripping is a huge part of what laid the groundwork for the art form that us polers have today. And respect should be paid along every step of one’s pole journey.