Dating advice for men: top 10 tips to give you a head start

If you’re a single guy seeking the perfect partner, follow these simple dating tips for men

12 April 2023 • 3:52pm

Dating can be a daunting prospect. However, every first date could be the start of a long and happy relationship. Here are 10 dating tips for men that will boost your chances of finding love.

Modern dating is less rule-based than it used to be. Fifty years ago, it was expected that the man would make the first move, pick up the bill, and generally be in the driver’s seat. Today, dating rules for men are more relaxed – but men can still feel under pressure.

Often guys struggle with flirting and dating, partly because they can find it hard to speak openly about these things with friends. Relationship advice for men is rarely a topic of conversation among mates.

Whether you’re new to dating, or returning to it after a long time, this dating advice for men will give you the confidence you need.

1. Put yourself out there

Finding a partner is virtually impossible if you don’t take the risk of interacting with someone you’ve never met before.

Perhaps you’ve had your heart broken in the past or you struggle with shyness – whatever the reason for your hesitation, it’s important to get past your nerves and commit to meeting new people.

By its nature, dating is a bit nerve-racking. It requires you to be vulnerable and open to new experiences. But rather than running a mile from it, try to embrace it. Remember that your companion on a date will be in exactly the same boat.

2. Meet people online and in real life

If you’re from an older generation, you’re probably more inclined to meet people in person rather than wade into the unknown world of dating apps. But if you’re younger, the thought of striking up conversation with a stranger in person might be terrifying.

In fact, one of the best dating tips for men is to try a combination of the two. Sign up to some online dating services, and at the same time make an effort to meet people in real life. If talking to strangers at a bar isn’t your thing, try taking up a new activity such as an exercise class or a book club.

Online apps can become a crutch for people who struggle with social interactions, so try not to rely on them too heavily. You need to practise feeling comfortable around people in real life. It does get easier the more you do it.

3. Don’t overthink your flirting technique

Flirting is not always easy, but in most cases it fails when you overthink it, or try “pick-up artist” tricks to impress someone, rather than relying on your natural charms.

A good tip when talking to someone new (whether online or in person) is to imagine you’re chatting with a friend or family member – this takes the pressure off, letting you relax and be yourself.

When meeting people in real life, make good eye contact and smile. Listen carefully when they speak, and engage with their stories by offering similar anecdotes. It’s okay to be tactile when flirting, but don’t overdo it – a light touch on the shoulder or hand now and again is fine, but more than that might make them uncomfortable.

Finally, remember the golden rule: if they tell you they’re not interested, or politely take themselves out of the conversation, don’t keep pursuing them.

4. Pick a suitable location to meet

While you may think a chic bar or expensive restaurant is an ideal first-date venue, they are not always conducive to having a good time.

If you meet your date in a noisy, busy bar, you might struggle to find seats or even hear the other person speaking. Fancy restaurants, meanwhile, can make you feel pressured and uncomfortable.

Instead of going for something “impressive”, opt for a place you know well – whether it’s that Victorian pub near your home or your favourite independent pizzeria. Also, remember that you can try something a bit different. Don’t be afraid to suggest a day date such as a picnic in the park or a stroll around an art gallery.

If it’s in a venue where you’re in your element, the date will automatically go more smoothly.

5. Make a good impression on your first date

One of the best dating tips for guys and girls is to look your best. First impressions are crucial. The first step to making a good impression is taking some time to polish your appearance.

Have a shower, spend a bit of time on your hair, and make sure you wear something clean (and preferably freshly ironed). There are no rules on what to wear on a first date, but it’s hard to go wrong with a fresh white shirt, dark jumper, and smart jeans or trousers. Trainers are okay as long as they’re fairly box-fresh.

Other than your appearance, making a good first impression is about being relaxed, confident and friendly. Confidence isn’t always easy to muster – so if you’re struggling, fake it till you make it!

6. Ask lots of questions

Online dating tips for men include using a smartphone dating app. However, when you’re actually on a date, it’s time to put your phone away. When you’re in company , scrolling and reading messages is a big no-no. Not only can a phone become a bad habit that leaves you less able to deal with social situations, using one on a date also indicates to the other person that they don’t have your full attention.

When you’re with your date, turn your phone to silent and put it in your pocket or bag. Leaving it on the table – even if it’s flipped over – means it’s still within easy reach.

7. Avoid checking your phone

When you’re with your date, turn your phone to silent and put it in your pocket or bag. Leaving it on the table – even if it’s flipped over – means it’s still within easy reach.

8. Don’t come on too strong

It can be tricky to strike the perfect balance on a first date. You want to come across as confident but not arrogant, interested but not nosy, and polite but not old-fashioned. The same balance needs to be struck when it comes to showing romantic interest in your date.

Even if you’re already hearing wedding bells, you shouldn’t be too forward or assume that your date feels the same. Don’t be afraid to give a few compliments and tell them you’ve had a great time – but don’t expect too much. If you want to see them again, ask for a second date, but don’t be pushy if they seem hesitant or simply say no.

The old relationship advice for men about playing hard to get isn’t a rule to live by, but there’s certainly some benefit to holding your feelings back until you’ve got to know a person better.

9. Debrief with friends

One of the best things to do post-date is to talk it over with one or two trusted friends – whether or not it went well, and so on. Generally a pal who’s in a committed and happy long-term relationship is more likely to be helpful than one who’s into serial one-night stands.

If the date went well, you can talk to your friends about how to proceed – and get their advice on how to craft that perfect follow-up text. And if the date went badly? They’ll be guaranteed to cheer you up.

10. Find love with Telegraph Dating

If we’ve inspired you to get out there and meet someone special, you can kick-start your search with Telegraph Dating. Our sophisticated two-way matching system will pair you with people who fit your personality and interests to a T.

If you're single and interested in meeting like-minded people, join Telegraph Dating. With more than 220,000 like-minded single people, Telegraph Dating is the best place to find romance.

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